Tuesday, March 15, 2011

My Gambling Future

Article- Casinos: Places where large sums of cash are won and lost all based on the risk you’re willing to take. The American Dream in all it’s glory. And while there are a lot of different places you can legally gamble in this country, you will tend to see some of the same types of people in almost every casino you enter. From the Bellagio in Las Vegas to Harrah’s in New Orleans to the Tropicana in A.C., these are a few of the people you’ll probably encounter either at the tables or on your third trip to the ATM.
#9- The old lady playing slots
#8- The guy who just lost a bundle
#7- The guy who has no idea what he’s doing
#6- The cocktail waitress who has seen it all before
#5- The Whale
#4- The Cooler
#3- The Huge Bouncer
#2- The guy who doesn’t care about losing money
#1- The drunk guy that seems to be lost

I plan on being every one of the gamblers on this list when i turn 21 (40 days). I live less than an hour away from Atlantic City and love to gamble and play cards. I will probably start by abusing the free drinks and end up being categorized as #1. Losing money sucks, but being drunk you make the rational "I've had 6 captain and cokes and lost $500 so I basically lost only $400. That's not to bad for 3 hours."

Then it is on to being #7. Once I get tired of losing all my money at drunk blackjack it is on the difficult to understand games, i.e. craps, baccarat, that game Barney plays with the jelly bean in Atlantic City.

After I become #8 from "learning" all the complicated games and losing everything I own, I will get a job as (the male equivalent of) #6. Working for tips that I can just go lose after my shift. But, since I am pretty much  broke I can only play the slots, turning me into #9.

As I slowly build up my fortune on the nickel slots I become #5. Betting millions on black (and green when I'm feeling lucky). After a while I become so rich I become #2, not giving a shit about losing it all. I've been poor before, fuck it if it happens again, which it probably will because I have shitty luck.

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